Well here we are once again. School season is upon us. As a special needs parent this can be a stress inducing time. You are now juggling the kiddo, their therapy, work, school, and the home. It’s overwhelming and every provider, therapist, and well meaning aunt tells you to make sure you are taking care of you.

Seriously! That what they have to say during our most difficult, “Take care of yourself”

or “Make sure you are doing self care”

and all you can think is “How?” and

“ Thanks, one more thing for me to do!”

We know that they mean well, but in reality unless they plan on jumping in to do something to actually help, their words are just another shot to the gut of an exhausted caretaker.

Then we add homework, and pajama day on top of it all. How is anyone getting in self care.

As a special needs parent, I have attended many counseling session for myself over the years, and one day I snapped on my counselor.

“ How am I suppose to fit one more thing in my day?!!!”

(I don’t think I ever yelled at someone that wasn’t family before.)

She very calmly sat with me for the rest of the session going over my day and finding all the gaps of when, in her mind, I could do something for me.

and I’ll never forget the moment I said to her, every gap you just found is the only time in the day I can breath, and now you want to take it away so I can have something else to do.

It was a wake up moment for her and for me. I was grieving and surviving. Self care was the last thing on my mind.

So It was then that we both realized I first needed to find my way out of survival, and into healing.

First, I needed to grieve all that had happened. Together in sessions we would go over all the emotions that I felt during my most difficult times. We came up with ways to handle them when they popped back in my life, and learned how to be ok with feeling them. To pray and open myself up to God and his Blessings.

Second, we started finding gratitude in my life. By listing everyday the things that I felt grateful for. Thanking God for giving me this amazing life.

Third, we started recognizing my village, the people God put in my life that I could turn to for help, advice, and respite. I went and asked for what I needed and came up with a plan for how I could find time to work on myself.

And last, I started finding time to actually do some selfceare.

I didn’t start out with these big grand things of a spa day, or a full day of no kids.I started with 5 minutes to literally breathe and wash my face, WITH SOAP! That was my first self care act.

I bring this up now because back to school, can bring out a lot of chaos. So Start now working on the steps you need to take to heal, and love yourself again.

I pray we all have Great back to school, and that every caretaker can find healing and time for self care.

*If you need help to heal there are some great online options now.

and you can always check your insurance to see what option you may have. Also finding a church, is an option for those who like attending, and for those who don’t there is an online option for Christians Called the Christian Care Connect.

Just know you are not alone, and we are a village.

If you would like one on one coaching I do provide coaching services.

Reach out to me in my contact.